Happy Birthday, Dad!

Dear Dad,
    Happy birthday (yesterday)! I'm still in shock as I write this that this is your second birthday without you here. There's still not a day that goes by that I don't think about you, and wish you were still here. The moments Ella looks at me, and for a glimpse, I see your facial expression, or something in her eyes that reminds me of you, it hits me to the core. It also makes me smile, because I know that you're still here. Sometimes I see Ella look off into the empty space of a room, and I wonder if she sees you--I hope that she does.
   There are still moments that hit me out of nowhere just how much I miss you and I cry. The other day we were leaving a furniture store and I mentioned how your birthday was coming up, and I just started bawling in the car. I miss my dad. That doesn't go away.
     I wish you could see me as a mom, and I wish I could see you in the role of grandpa. Gosh, Ella would have loved you. And your glasses (she's quite taken with glasses). I'm sad for her that she won't get to know you the way that a girl gets to know and love on her grandfather. I'll always still tell her about you, though, so don't worry.

   We're gonna come and visit your grave soon with Ella, once it's a little warmer for her. Just know that on your birthday especially (and pretty much most other days too) I'm reminded of the amazing dad I have and how lucky I was to have you for as long as I did. I always wish it had been longer, but the time we had, we made count. I love you, Dad. Happy birthday!

 Love always (your favorite daughter :),

Jennifer