Weekend Recap

Whew! Another super busy weekend in the books, and I'm wiped!

Friday night MG and I had plans to hang out with some friends of ours, but due to some last minute events, those plans got cancelled so MG and I went out for dinner ourselves and enjoyed being lazy on the couch, watching tv. Just what the doctor ordered!

Saturday we had to get ready for the wedding drama couple's wedding, and an hour drive to where the wedding was taking place. Unfortunately, leading up to the wedding day some extra crappy stuff happened (MG was uninvited to the rehearsal dinner 3 days before the dinner under the premise that the guest list was too large and they were keeping it to the immediate bridal party, not the ushers, etc. and then found out that the other 2 ushers were still invited, and also included in the pre-wedding activities like golfing etc, and MG wasn't...which just left kind of a nasty taste in our mouths after everything that's happened up until this point).

But, despite all of that, we got ourselves ready and attended the wedding. It was a short, but sweet ceremony and very pretty. The bride's dress was very pretty and the bridesmaids dresses were also really nice, in different shades of purple. (And, despite not changing anything in relation to our wedding, or "coordinating" our weddings, both weddings were totally different and lots of fun.)

After the ceremony there was a bit of rain that came through, but that lent itself to a double rainbow, which was pretty symbolic since the groom's father and his friend/best man had both passed away within the last year and a half.  I was happy for him that he had that reminder that they were there that day--it was a really special moment.

The reception was in a tent on the same site. It was really fun getting our escort cards and seeing my new last name on it. MG seemed pretty pleased by it as well :) 

We had a great time with our friends and enjoyed a long night of eating, drinking and dancing.

We spent some time at the hotel lobby with everyone after the ceremony was over, and then made our way to sleepy town.

I'm hopeful that we can all put the drama behind us now and move forward, in whatever direction that may be.

Sunday we made the journey back home, picked up Cooper from my parents house (he had a nice night getting spoiled by my parents), ran our weekend errands and tried to recoup before another week, and another wedding next weekend!

Happy Monday and Happy Cinco De Mayo!

Weekend Happenings

Happy Monday! Even happier because it's being brought to you from my couch and not work :) Winter Break is in full swing and I'm enjoying every second of it!

Let's recap the weekend!

Friday night MG and I got sushi for dinner, followed by a low key night in with a movie. We went to bed before 11...old people! haha

View driving into DC

It was actually good,  because Saturday morning we were up early to eat breakfast and then head into DC to volunteer at the Food Bank. We were put in charge of loading cans and other goods onto a conveyor belt for the rest of the volunteers to sort and box. We worked really hard for 2 and a half hours. It was hard work (I was sweating by the time we were done), but it felt good to have done something to help others, even if it was indirectly.

After that we went to have lunch in the city. The weather was GORGEOUS...high 60's, low 70's. While we were out one of my coworkers texted me to meet up with her and her husband for drinks outside, so we met up with them and some of their friends for a bit, and soaked in the amazing Spring weather in Winter :)

Then it was time to head home and get ready for the holiday/baby announcement party with MG's friends.

The party was really nice, and the couple found out that they are having a boy! They had confetti poppers with the color inside, so they were showered in blue! It was really fun to be a part of that.

The only downfall--and I want to share this because I'm having a hard time dealing with it--is that while we were in their kitchen MG and I were talking to someone, and both of us recognized that, among the Save the Dates and Christmas cards on their fridge, our save the date was missing. MG playfully said something to the husband of the house, and he said something like "oh...we realized earlier it was upstairs, but..." and then trailed off and kind of distracted himself with something else. So, it made me feel like they never had it up...and that they were going to put it up when we were coming, but otherwise wouldn't have. (Earlier, she had told me that they had gotten our Save the Date around the same time as another one, so I know that they had gotten it). Plus, the wedding drama couple's Save the Date AND Christmas card were up on the fridge, neither of which was magnetic. There was also a save the date from LAST June up there with one for July of 2014 as well.

I get that it's just a magnet, but it goes deeper than that, and it really hurt my feelings. MG was bothered by it, too. This girl is one of the wedding drama couple's good friends (but I've heard she had actually said that the email that was written to me was mean), but this couple wasn't directly involved in the drama, and they were supposedly MG's friends, too.  And, just when I thought we were all 'moving forward,' putting things behind us, I realize that it's not. 

I'm trying not to let this get to me, but it was hurtful, and I've gotten upset about it. Part of me wants to reach out and say something to her, but really what will that accomplish? (The other part of me wants to say "if you're too embarrassed, or whatever, about our wedding, then we'll spare you and not send you an invite"....but that won't accomplish anything either). I guess I just need to vent, and if anyone has any advice for how to not let this bother me, please share.

Anyway, Sunday started out SUPER warm (I went to walk Cooper thinking it might be a little chilly, and it was HOT). In the morning, I met up with my good friend Bree who I haven't seen in FOREVER, and got to hang out, eat breakfast, and see her pretty engagement ring since I haven't seen her since she got engaged (we really need to make sure it doesn't go this long again, Bree!) 

The rest of the day was pretty rainy and overcast. MG watched football with his friends and I took it easy since this weekend was super jam-packed.

At least tonight I have MG's and my annual Christmas dinner at Old Ebbitt Grill to look forward to. Yummy food, drinks and dessert with my love! :)

   

Mean People Suck

Some people really piss me off.

Apparently over the weekend one of MG's "friends" (someone who he used to hang out with, but really has nothing to do with anymore...thankfully, because he is the epitome of a piece of sh*t), decided that he needed to take one of our engagement pictures that had Cooper in it, and send it around in a text message to a group of guys (MG's friends...and probably even some people he doesn't know) with stupid comments on it. I don't know exactly what it said, but knowing this guy, it was nowhere close to nice.

This is the same guy who takes pictures of girls that he takes home at night, while they are sleeping naked in his bed, and then sends it to his guy friends (see why MG doesn't hang out with him anymore?). Quality person.

Why does someone feel the need to take something nice and innocent, that MOST engaged people do, and turn it into something that's not nice? Oh, another person to rain on our parade and cast a dark cloud over what is SUPPOSED to be a happy time?? Awesome. JUST what I wanted.

Why aren't we allowed to be happy and enjoy this time? We have to deal with people telling us to change our date, then colors, and dresses, and suits and invitations, and then have lies spread about us, then I'm treated like I don't exist and I'm a horrible person. And just when that was calming down, this ASSHOLE decides that he needs to do this. Did he include MG on it? Of course not. He just felt the need to make stupid comments while circulating our picture. Apparently he has nothing better to do with his life and time than stupid crap like this. Well done. What a class act.

Since it's apparently ok to take people's pictures and do what you want with them....

Joey B., (oh, how I debated using his full name, and even linking to his facebook profile...) you are the definition of what it is to be an asshole. Get a life and leave us the hell alone. The only thing you accomplished was making yourself look like an even bigger a-hole than everyone already comments that you are. Well played, a**face. I feel sorry for you because it is so obvious how pathetic you truly are. You play it all big and bad, and act like a tough guy, but what it really comes down to is, you're a nobody. This is what you feel like you should spend your time doing?? Real productive. Why don't you take a little of that time to look in the mirror instead of coming up with stupid crap to text your friends, or different ways to try and bring someone down?

Sorry for the rant. I'm just tired of these jerks trying to ruin everything that's supposed to be happy with this time. Really freaking sick of it.

I appreciate all of your sweet comments on the pictures yesterday. Everyone, with the exception of this jack-hole, has had nice things to say and I very much appreciate the love and support all of the positive people have shown, so thank you.

Wedding Drama: Update

I realized when looking back at some of my old posts, that I never filled you guys in on what happened after the wedding drama where MG's friends (we can use air quotes around "friends" now) asked us to change our wedding date, and then the girl in the relationship sent me an email basically telling me that I couldn't have the same colors, bridesmaid dresses, groomsmen attire, songs, invitations, etc that she had. Read about that here to refresh your memory.

As much as I want to put this behind me, I wanted to update you guys so that you're aware of what's been going on, because, let's be real, it is bat-sh*t crazy.

So, after their friend passed away, we decided to ignore the email and hoped that it would go away and not be brought up again. Well, the friend's funeral was that Saturday and on Monday morning I got this email from the girl:

"Just re-sending this to you, to ensure that you got it. Thanks. " and then she re-sent the email that she'd previously sent.

So, at that point we knew we had to deal with it. MG and I wrote up a response and sent it to her later that night. Here's what it said:

Hi {R},

  Neither of us responded to your email because it seemed inappropriate to talk about any of this when you guys were dealing with the loss of a friend. We were surprised to see your email last weekend, in general, and given what was going on. With any passing, it puts things into perspective and it has made us focus even more on what is really important in life, because you never know what can happen.

 If the things you mentioned in your email bother you, it's unfortunate, but our focus for our wedding is on the bonds we are bringing to our future marriage. We are excited to spend the rest of our lives together and to be married. That is what is truly important to us. Five years from now, what color our wedding was or your wedding was, isn't going to matter. So, I think it's best if we both focus on what is going to make this day special and memorable for us, and on the important stuff here, which is planning a future with our significant others that is going to be strong and lasting. Not the details of one day of the rest of our lives. We want your day to be exactly what you want it to be and how you’ve pictured it, and we know you want the same for us. So, no need to stress one another out with coordinating even more details (after all, there are already so many as it is with wedding planning, as you know). We will continue planning for our ideal wedding day, just as you guys are, and even if there are some similar features, both wedding days will be unique and special to us, our friends, and our families. :)

Jenn and {MG}

The next morning, I got this email back from her:

Hi Jenn,

Thanks for the response!  I didn't want there to be any tension while we plan our weddings, and like I said before, I am sure both of ourweddings will be beautiful and a lot of fun.  Good luck with everything. 

Hoping that would be the end of it (but knowing it wasn't likely), we dropped it. And then we found out that they were going around to different people in the group, telling them that we told them they dealt with their friends' death inappropriately, and various other lies about what the email said. In actuality, our email does NOT say anything about that. And in reality, we hadn't said a word about this to any of our mutual friends, we hadn't sought them out to tell our "side" (even though we wanted to). People have come to us to tell us how ridiculous they think it is, and to tell us what is being said about us.

Also, this girl, who "didn't want there to be any tension" now refuses to acknowledge me at social gatherings and leaves me off of emails to the group and invitations to things.  Basically, I'm being 'punished' for planning the wedding that I've always dreamed of. So much for no tension....

What I've realized through this whole thing is mainly that it must suck to be so unhappy, that someone else's happiness in some way threatens your own. Truly happy people are capable of being happy for someone else's happiness. Not to mention the fact that not only are they NOT happy for us, but are going out of their way to tell lies about us that attack our character. I would NEVER tell someone how they should/shouldn't respond or react to a death. It's not my place. THAT part bothers me the most....that they are telling people these things that are blatant lies about the people we are.  

So, as much as possible, we are trying to ignore and avoid them at all costs and every opportunity that we can, and if people ask us what happened, we tell them. Whenever that happens, the response has 100% been "it's ridiculous."

That's where we're at. I'd LOVE to hear your comments and thoughts! :)

Moving Forward

I admit it. I have a hard time letting things go. Especially things that I have little to no control over. Or, after the part that I do have control over (because if I had control over it, I'd fix it and it wouldn't be an issue).

I need to let things go that I can't change. It's not good to hold onto stress, anger, hurt, resentment, or any other things like that. It's not healthy....mentally, emotionally or physically.

{via}

For myself, and my well being, I'm CHOOSING to let the drama go. Drama I don't want. Drama I never wanted to be a part of. Drama that I've been dragged into. Drama that I've tried to deal with in the most mature way possible.

I've done what I can. I'm proud of who I am. I can't change anyone else. Or their actions.

But I CAN choose to move on and focus on the positive.

Like my amazing friends, family and fiance. And all of the kick a** things that are going on in my life.

Onward and upward! Adios, drama!

Drama drama drama...

Yesterday I told you that I'd explain how my cute way of asking my girls to be in our wedding (cute little dress ornaments) turned into drama.

If you all remember, a week after MG and I got engaged, a couple friend of his asked us to change our date because it was "too close" to their wedding (ours is 3 weeks before theirs). Last week MG finally talked to the guy and explained our rationale for having our wedding on the date we chose--my dad's health being the main reason, but also b/c I'm a teacher and it's my Spring Break (which we shouldn't have had to explain anyway). He responded with "Oh, ok, if her dad is the reason, no problem at all. We just thought it was ONLY because it was Jenn's Spring Break" (to which I wanted to say "and so what if it was??")

Needless to say, we thought the issue was put to rest, as he had said it would be. During the same conversation, MG found out that this guy's best friend had just been medi-vacced to a hospital, and was in a coma on life support. We both prayed for his friend that night.

Cut to Sunday afternoon. My friend had posted the pic of the ornament dresses on facebook a day or so before and said how she's excited to wear a purple dress for my wedding. 
We are in Charleston with our friends and I get an email from the girl in this couple. THIS email to be exact:

Hi Jenn - I saw that you signed at the venue and were able to get a church too - that's great!  Congrats :) This is when all the fun stuff starts!  I feel like I was stressed until I had a venue, and then things started to click into place.

Since our wedding dates are very close together, I thought we should keep an open line of communication on decisions we both make during the wedding planning process, so we can avoid having identical weddings three weeks a part.  I am not saying that if I have a plated dinner, you shouldn't have a plated dinner - but I am talking more in terms of style and distinction such as color theme, bridesmaids dresses, groomsmen attire, wedding songs, etc.  Does that make sense?   We both have very different styles, so I am sure our wedding plans won't align too much, but I think this could be good to discuss just in case. We really want to avoid similar elements such as {MG's} groomsmen wearing the same thing as {C} & his groomsmen, the same invitations, same favors, etc., and I am pretty sure my girlfriends wouldn't be too happy about having to wear the same or similar bridesmaid dress that was worn three weeks prior.  

Since {C} & I have been planning since December, we do have a few wedding items confirmed already that I wanted to tell you about right off the bat.  In general, our wedding scheme is different shades of purple, ivory, with hints of green.  And you may already know that the bridesmaid dresses are purple, and from Alfred Angelo - (bought, paid for, and coming in September yay!), and I can send you the style number if need be.  {C} & his groomsmen are wearing three piece gray suits. We have intro songs, first dance songs, etc picked out haha, but I am sure you haven't started thinking about that yet.  Actually, we have a lot confirmed so far because I am a crazy planner, but that's all that I think would matter right now :).

Regardless, I think both of our weddings will be amazing, and a great time.  I just want to make sure they are both as unique as we both are, and I feel this is the best way to have stress-free planning! 

Cheers,

{R}

Keep in mind, the ONLY parts of this email that were changed were names. Also remember, that when she sent this email C's best friend was still in the hospital on life support and in a coma.

Also realize that we have MAYBE 12 friends who would be going to both of our weddings. None of which are IN our wedding (some of which are in theirs).

I'm pretty sure I cussed more after reading this email than I ever have in my entire life. MG was LIVID (as was I). We spent the rest of the weekend talking sporadically to try and figure out what we should do to handle it (since we didn't want to let this ruin our vacation with our friends).

Well, Monday night when we landed back home, MG got an email saying that C's friend had passed away. Obviously, this is the worst news to get. None of us wanted this to happen. Our hearts go out to C and all of his friends.

And now, how to handle this situation? Instead of addressing them/her as we had planned, I think we have to ignore it for now until it is brought up again, or until a better time arises if there ever is one in a situation like this. I've been having a hard time not getting angry (or even furious) every time I think about this situation, though, and dealing with the fact that this is now looming over us. We aren't heartless people, though, and our hearts go out to them dealing with losing a close friend. No one should have to go through that.

I want to know you guys' thoughts on this. I've heard it from our families and friends....I just want total outsiders' opinions on the whole thing. What do you think of her email? Her requests? How to handle the situation? 

Thanks in advance!

*hugs*