Funny Kid Stories

Since we're approaching the end of the never-ending school year, I thought it'd be a great time to post some funny kid stories that I've been collecting over the past few months.
I hope you enjoy these as much as I did hearing them :)

Overheard from a 3rd or 4th grader, across the hall in the girls' bathroom: "I'm a goddess, not a person"
Must be nice!
~.~.~

Back in the Winter, after two months of not having one FULL week of school without delays or snow days, I was walking outside with one of my 2nd graders to our modular in the midst of a rain storm, and she asks: "Why didn't we have a delay this morning?....It's raining" Unfortunately we don't get off for any day that simply isn't sunny haha
~.~.~

Two weeks ago (when the weather was regularly warm and no more chances of snow), it was supposed to rain/storm that day, and I overheard a student tell another kid, "I think school's gonna be cancelled today"
Either it was wishful thinking (I'm right there with ya, kid), or he was another kid confused by how many snow days we had this year
~.~.~

Another statement overheard from the girls' bathroom: "This isn't a social hour! Come on, let's go!" (and yes, that was from a student, not a teacher....but I'm willing to bet she didn't come up with that one herself)
~.~.~

I was walking into the main office to file some paperwork when I overheard a Preschool boy talking on the phone to his mother from the nurse's office. Imagine the cutest little voice saying this:

"I frowed up in the classroom.......but I came to the clinic and Mr. Nick did magic and I feeling better now".....

"Yeah....I frowed up in the classroom...but I no frowing up no more"

I died at the cuteness!

~.~.~

I have a 3rd grader working on not lisping sounds, so he has lots of 's' words. For each word (mice, mess, lace) he put the words into sentences and he kept re-using the same sentence "I have _____ in my bedroom." The next word on his list was "kiss" which he didn't want to do, but did anyway (while giggling, mind you). And when it got time for him to do his sentence, the other kid in the group asks, "Do you have THOSE in your bedroom, too?" 
I busted out laughing and so did the kids. I couldn't help it.
~.~.~

I'm hopeful that the rest of the week (and a day) of school will lend itself to a few more funnies which will make the end of the year craziness that much better!
Hope that brightened your day and made you laugh :)